[disparate]

you weigh so heavily 
on my heart 
on my body 
on my mind

a constant companion 
these many years – 
i wish to terminate 
our relationship 
our understanding 
my guilt 
your control 
you 
 
small comfort, 
you may have been 
a dysfunctional 
security blanket 
a wall of self-pity 
closing me off from 
the world 
love 
myself 
 
smother me no more 
stifle my spirit, ne'er again
the suffering ends here 
your hold over me, 
now broken 
the pain 
the longing 
the apathy 
all will cease 
 
i will be rid of you 
and if not you, then
at least the trepidation 
you inspire 
vanquish you, I must 
disparate and conquer, 
I will